Drinking Away the Pain
by Browneyedlazywriter
Summary: After ten years of living with Russia you are finally free, but a lot has changed since you've been home especially the boy you were in love with. One Shot.


Most people have wondered, but very few know what happens when the person who represents a country dies. If the person chosen to represent their country is found to be sickly a replacement is needed. Not just anyone can be chosen to become the next country representative. A majority of the time a sibling takes the other's place, and that is the precise reason for your birth. Your older brother Padric was chosen to represent Ireland, but because he was so sickly throughout most of his young life; your parents had you, so that in the event of your brother's death you would be able to take his place. That day unfortunately came when you were just seven years old. Your parents had died in a horrible car accident when you were three so the only family you had left was your best friend Alistair Kirkland, whom you had grown up with. When word had spread about your brother's death; Russia being the powerful country he was promised to raise you to become a strong country and once you was old enough he would allow you to come back.

Your P.O.V.

You sat in your room staring at the blank walls with faded squares where pictures used to be; wishing that you could simply freeze time and live in that moment forever. *Knock, Knock* Alistair stood in the doorway his stunning green eyes lighting up the dull room.

"(y/n) please don't go with him…" his eyes soaked with sadness.

You walked over to him wrapping your arms around his neck "I wish I could stay with you, but I have to go live with Mr. Russia for a little while. Don't worry we will see each other real soon." Alistair forced a weak smile.

"You promise?" You flashed him a huge grin.

"I promise!" and gave him a quick peck on the cheek. Alistair's face was hot with embarrassment as he held your hand as you waited for Ivan. Ivan pulled up in a shiny black SUV with a Russian flag on top of the antenna.

"Are you ready to go da?" you nodded and gave Alistair one last hug goodbye.

And that was the last time Alistair and you would see each other.

Living at Ivan's house.

"(y/n) I would like you to meet my sisters Yekaerin and Natalia." you bowed

"It's very nice to meet you both." Yekaerin smiled sweetly,

"It's very nice to meet you as well (y/n) you can think of us as your big sister's from now on." Ivan placed his hand on top of your head.

"I'm going to teach you to be strong; one day you will be as strong as me and we will crush all the other puny countries that get in our way." you simply smiled back up at him unsure if he was truly serious or not.

On the days that Ivan didn't teach you all of the important tactics of being strong country; Yekaerin would teach you how to cook, clean, knit and sew. She quickly became the mom you needed.

Alistair unfortunately wasn't as lucky as you were; (y/n) were the only family Alistair had and you was no longer with him. Everyday when he we would come home from school he would check the mail box for a letter from you and if there was no letter he would run to the phone to check the answering machine to see if he missed your call, but nothing ever came and Alistair began to hate you for breaking your promise.

Ten years later

The day had finally come, today you were finally recognized as a country. As you walked up the steps to the conference building your heart felt like it was going to beat out of your chest. "I hope that everyone likes me… I hope that Alistair is there."

Your hands trembled as you opened the door to the country conference.

You had often visited it with brother when you were a small child, but unlike before you couldn't just hide behind her brother's leg because you didn't feel like talking to any of these people, you had too. You scanned the room looking for a familiar face but the only faces you knew where Ivan, Yekaterin and Natalia. You gave them a friendly wave and Yekaterin motioned you over to them. Since you didn't know anyone else they were really your only option.

"Hi guys." Yekaterin gave her a warm smile,

"Are you excited for your very first country meeting today?" you nodded

"Yea, I just don't know where I am supposed to sit." Ivan picked up a flag off the table.

"Just sit where you see you country's flag da." you bowed like you used to when you lived at his house,

"Thank you."

You took your seat next to a boy who couldn't of been much older than yourself with bright red hair that reeked of liquor and seemed to be sleeping on the table.

"I wonder who this country is." you thought to yourself.

"Alright let's start roll call so we can get this meeting to order!" Germany yelled over all the side conversations.

"America."

"The Hero is in the house!"

"England."

"Present." as Germany got to your name he paused for a moment and said

"I see we have a new country representative with us today." he looked over at you

"Would you please stand state your name and your country please." you took a deep breath and stood up.

"My name is (y/n), (f/n) (l/n) and I am representing the country of Ireland. It is a pleasure to meet you all." When you returned to you seat a pair of piercing green eyes with black holes for pupils were inches away from your own.

"What was your name love?" He said in a thick Scottish accent that reeked of liquor. you stared back at the man for a few seconds trying to figure out who he was before saying,

"(full name), and may I be so bold as to ask what your name is sir?" He looked a little hurt as the last part escaped your lips.

"You really don't remember me do you…" you could see the deep prolonged sadness in his striking green eyes.

"You'd think I would remember someone with eyes as sad as his." you thought to herself before replying,

"I'm sorry, I can't say that I do." his face looked like you had just kicked a puppy. He took a deep breath and said,

"It's me, Alistair. Alistair Kirkland." you covered your mouth with your hand trying to hold back the emotion welling up inside.

"Alistair, is that really you!"

"In the flesh." you hugged him tightly.

"I have missed you so much!" you said with tears welling up in your eyes

"Yea, missed me so much that you haven't bothered to visit or even call me over the past ten years." he retorted with a thick undertone of disgust.

You felt like someone had just punched you in the gut, but before you could explain yourself Ludwig's voice once again boomed over everyone else's.

"If I could have everyone's attention, we can get this meeting started."

The country meeting that you had so long awaited wasn't going how you'd hoped it would. You were having a hard time paying attention to what was going on because Alistair's words were replying in your head over and over again.

As soon as the meeting had ended you tried to talk to Alistair again but he was already headed for the door. You quickly rushed after him hoping that you could talk.

"Alistair please wait I really need to talk to you!" without even stopping to look back at you,

"You had ten years to talk, don't you think now is a little too late?" he retorted and walked away.

You crumbled to your knees, not wanting to believe the boy you grew up with, the boy you were in love with was the same person walking away from you now.

"Alistair, What happened to you…" you whispered softly.

You saw something white flash beside your face. you looked up to see a tall Turkish man with a white mask covering his face standing beside you extending a tissue out to you.

"Did he say something rude to you? He really needs to learn some self-control." You looked up at him,

"I'm sorry let me start over, I'm Sadık and the very angry man that just walked away is Alistair." you stood up wiping the stray tears out from under your eyes.

"Has he always been cold hearted like that?"

"As long as I have known him, which would be roughly 7 years. He lost his family when he was very young, So he has been alone most of his life which is probably why he drinks so much… between you and me I think he is trying to forget something."

"Or someone…" you mumbled under your breath.

"What did you say?" Sadık asked. You looked back up at him,

"I didn't say anything. It was very nice to meet you Sadık, but I best be going." He smiled back at you,

"I'll see you around!"

You sat in your car in silence tears streaming down your cheeks.

"I need to go see him… But will he listen to what I have to say?" you thought to yourself.

Your heart felt as if it was going to beat out of your chest which each step. When you finally reached the door a lump had formed in your throat and you was afraid you wouldn't be able to speak when he answered the door. With a shaky hand you rapped on the door twice. When the door opened Alistair stood in the door frame his arms firmly crossed.

"What the hell do you want." You gulped.

"I need to talk to you." you replied your voice trembling as you tired to hold back the tears.

"Look I told you before I am not really in the mood to hear anything that you have to say." You took a step closer.

"Alistair please…" without a second thought he slammed the door in your face.

"Alistair you don't understand." you said as you pounded your fist on the door.

"I wanted, more than anything to visit you when I left but- tears started welling up in your eyes- Mr. Russia wouldn't let me. He knew that I loved you, but he still refused to let me go and visit you." there was silence on the other side of the wall. Tears now streamed down your face as you slowly walked away from Alistair's house.

Alistair's P.O.V.

"I wanted, more than anything to visit you when I left but… Mr. Russia wouldn't let me. He knew that I loved you, but he still refused to let me go and visit you."

Alistair sunk to the floor tears flowing down his face.

"I'm such an idiot!" Alistair mumbled to himself

Your P.O.V.

You heard a door open behind you but you refused to turn around. You didn't want him to let him see you cry. A pair of strong arms wrapped around you causing you to stop dead in your tracks.

"I'm sorry (y/n), I am so sorry… I didn't protect you from Russia." You spun around to see tears flowing down from his bright eyes. He nuzzled his head in the nape of your neck, holding you tightly to him.

"I promised your brother! I promised that I would always protect you, but instead I chose to drink the memories of you away…" Alistair felt your hot tears drip onto his cheek, he looked up to see your eyes squeezed shut, and tears streaming down your face. He held your face in his hand wiping the stray tears from your cheeks. You opened your blood shot eyes and wrapped your arms around his neck as he whispered,

"Let's go home and make new memories together." and softly kissed your lips.

Padric: Ireland (In a way I guess you could say he is my Hetalia OC, but I find Hetalia OC's very clique so think of him however you like.)

Alistair: Scotland

Sadık: Turkey

Yekaterin: Ukraine

Natalia: Belarus

Ivan: Russia


End file.
